Chapter Seven
In Which A Heck Of A Lot Happens

The path led them through the meadow, across a shallow river and up a steep, tree-studded hill. Bob was getting tired again, and even Val's boundless energy was flagging. "How much further is it?"

"Good question. Glitch - progress report." He checked the keytool's display and brightened. "This is good. We're on the second-to-last level. Only one more challenge before we reach the garden." Everyone looked very happy to hear this. With strength born of improved morale, Bob strode briskly forward and crested the hill. "Make that two, actually," he corrected himself, spotting the User.

The paths that had begun atop the rainbow were finally reconverging, about sixteen paces ahead of them. The other path looked to have come up about a third of the way around the hill from them, and the merged trail headed down the gentler slope on the other side. Moving quickly down this trail was a brawny, peach-skinned, curly-bearded figure. "Shoot," Bob added with a sigh.

"Good idea," chirped Val, and let fly an arrow. Scarcely had it left her bow when the User whirled around and moved his arm in a throwing motion. A jagged bolt of yellow light shot from his hand to intercept the arrow, there was a bright flash and a thunderclap, and the arrow was gone.

"Oh, dear," said Val.

"Two can play at that game!" Enzo drew the wand from his belt and flew up for a clearer shot. "Let's see you burn this!" he called, and fired a stream of energy at the User.

The User threw another lightning bolt, which met the blue-white blast halfway. For an instant, User and child were connected by a blinding chartreuse line. Then there was an unpleasant sizzling noise and both were flung backwards. Enzo smacked into a tree, fell to the ground, and lay still.

"Enzo!" screamed all three older sprites in near-unison. They ran to the recumbent, flickering sprite. Without looking to see what the others were doing, Bob crouched next to Enzo and started strumming frantically. His colour filled in almost immediately, but it was a full (and very frightening) nanosecond before the small sprite twitched and groaned.

"Enzo!" Bob said with relief. "Are you okay?" It was a foolish question, but this wasn't the time to come up with a witty remark.

"Ugh… sort of…" Enzo raised his head and winced.

"Don't get up yet. Give it another couple verses," said Bob, still playing. Enzo grimaced and nodded.

"Bobby!" Val whispered anxiously. "The User's getting up!"

"I take it back," said Bob. "Get up and get behind the tree." He thought for a moment and added, "But not right under it."

"Here," said Matrix, and picked Enzo up. He deposited his unresisting backup on a thick patch of moss on the other side of the tree, and then peered back around the trunk, muttering about ranged weapons and armour made from copper alloys. Bob followed and did not stop playing for an instant.

"Bobby?" said Val in a level voice. No one's voice was that level who was feeling at all calm. "The User's continuing down the path. He's moving pretty quickly. Would you say this was an emergency?"

"Very much so," agreed Bob in a voice every bit as level as Val's.

"I can't shoot him, Enzo can but not without getting injured himself, you're busy with Enzo, and Matrix won't be able to get near him. I think it's about time for a last resort."

Bob hesitated only for an instant. Gritting his teeth, he looked up at Val and nodded. "Go for it."

Val nodded back at him. She wasn't looking at all cheerful now; her face was set and grim. She walked out into the open. Drawing back her empty bowstring, she sighted carefully along nothing at all and fired it at the departing User.

Something thin and silvery-white flew from the bow. The User spun around and tried to counter it, but even lightning couldn't damage an arrow made of moonlight. The bolt zapped harmlessly past the tree, behind which Val had hastily ducked, and the moonbeam continued unimpeded and struck the User right between the eyes. The User stiffened and stood as still as if he had seen a gorgon. The sprites exchanged amazed looks.

"Gosh," said Val. "That was lucky. Let's get going before he recovers. You feeling better yet, Enzo?"

Enzo moved his arms experimentally. "Yeah. Just a little sore still, but I can fly fine. Let's go." He got to his feet a bit stiffly, rose into the air, emerged from the shelter of the tree, and froze as a lightning bolt missed him by inches.

They stared at the User in horror. The erratic nature of Val's Game-power was becoming apparent. The User had shaken off his initial paralysis and was now walking very quickly in a small circle, hurling lightning in random directions. The group shook off their own paralysis and huddled behind the tree while craters appeared in the scenery.

"Not good. This is not good," Bob screamed over the thunder and scattered explosions.

"Hey, at least he's not aiming at us anymore!" Val yelled.

"Oh, yeah! That's a big help!" shouted Matrix.

"Well, he's not getting any closer to the garden, is he?"

"Neither are we! How are we supposed to get past him?"

"M-maybe we could dodge the lightning?" Enzo suggested tremulously. His face was a graphic of utter misery.

"Maybe, but do you really want to try that?" Bob answered dryly.

"Well, we can't just wait for the insanity to wear off," Val pointed out. "Then we'll be right back where we started."

There was a particularly close crack of thunder, and the trunk of the tree split.

"Looks like we don't have much of a choice," yelled Matrix. "We won't be safe here much longer. On three… one…"

And then he stopped shouting, because he had been shouting to be heard over the thunder, and the thunder had stopped. They all blinked at each other, surprised but pleased, and peered around the tree. The User had, indeed, stopped his random and wanton destruction. He was lying on his back, pointing at clouds and giggling. The four sprites looked at the User, and then at each other. Then, without a word being spoken, they ran as fast as they could, past the User and down the gently sloping path. Even when the User was lost first to view and then to hearing, they didn't slow down.

"Thank the Net it changed so quickly," panted Bob.

"But who knows what he'll start doing next?" Matrix replied sourly. "Let's hurry up and finish this Game already!"

"Noooo," retorted Val. "I was gonna say we should sit down and have a picnic."

Matrix bristled. "Now, look, kid…"

"Guys! Chill!" called Enzo from above. "I think I see the next Game sprite - and the garden!"

"Good," said Matrix. "Come on, let's get this over with."

Three nanos and two bends in the path brought them in sight of the Game sprite, and then they did slow down. The Game sprite looked mostly like a lion, except that it was at least twice as big as any lion had a right to be. Equally oversized wings sprouted from its shoulder blades. Its head was a woman's, with tawny skin and long brown hair. It - she - was crouched in front of a golden gate three times the height of a grown sprite, set in a white marble wall around a circular enclosure. No one had to ask what she was guarding.

"Sphinx," murmured Matrix. "Don't see many of those."

"That's probably just as well," said Val.

"You got that right. Everybody be careful."

They approached the sphinx cautiously, watching for any sign of movement. None came, save for an occasional twitch of the tip of her tail.

"She must have seen us by now," whispered Val. "I think she's a passive."

"I think you're right," said Bob. "Even a defensive would have attacked by - "

"Halt!" Startled, they complied. The sphinx looked down her nose at them and said in a resonant contralto:

"If you seek to pass me by,
To solve my riddle you must try.
Should you fail, you'd best stay mum,
Else my supper you'll become."

Bob processed this and blinked.

"Well, well. A passive-aggressive. This is interesting." Most non-AI Game sprites fell solidly into one of four behavioural categories. Hybrids were unusual, although not unheard-of. Bob was impressed.

He glanced around at his companions. Matrix's face was impassive. Little Enzo, as usual, seemed to think this latest development was simply too cool for words. And Val… she looked as though she had just watched a system restart from atop the Principal Office subsphere. Her eyes were closed, her grin so broad that Bob's own jaw began to ache in sympathy, and she appeared to be repeating the word "yes" under her breath. Bob smirked; Val would react like that.

"Okay," he told the sphinx, "let's hear it."

The sphinx smiled and recited,

"Is it not a merry jest?
Up we lift 'til we are sore,
Yet, when we have earned our rest,
Upwards we must go once more."

Bob listened carefully to the riddle and repeated it several times in his head. Nothing sprang immediately to mind; all he could tell was that the answer was a plural noun. He looked at the others. Matrix and Enzo shrugged. Val's lips were pursed and her brow was furrowed. She was looking around at the scenery, the sphinx, her companions. Searching for visual clues, thought Bob. He emulated her. Trees? he thought. They go up, but they don't really lift up. Besides, trees probably don't get sore, and if they rest, I certainly don't know how to tell the difference. Clouds? They certainly don't get sore. This is a tough one. Bummer. He started to pace. Birds? Flying for a long time is tiring; Matrix said so. Birds roost in trees, that's up… but it's still down from the sky, so they're not going upwards to rest. What else goes up? Elevators? No, that's totally anachronistic… Acrobats? Now that's just silly…

"Feet!" shouted Val.

Bob's head jerked around to stare at his beaming cousin, and then at the sphinx, who rose slowly to her feet and padded off to the left of the gate, leaving the way clear.

"Since this game of wits you win,
You've nought to fear but what's within."

Bob stepped forward, wearing a faintly bemused smile. "Wow, Val! How'd you figure that one out?"

Val grinned. "You gave me the idea, actually."

"I did? How'd I do that?"

"By pacing."

"Oh. Huh." Bob shrugged, stepped up to the gate, and touched it. It swung open, and the companions entered the garden of the Hesperides.

Bob whistled loudly. The User who had programmed this Game had outdone Himself. The garden was vast and lush, with dozens of different kinds of flowers, exquisitely manicured hedges, and assorted fruit trees. There was a large fishpond, and assorted statuary, and elaborate topiary creations, and a number of peafowl wandering about the place.

There were also four larger Game sprites present. Three were datoid - young, female, and lovely, with identical pale peach skins, long curly hair, and slender physiques. They were, in fact, identical in every respect except for the colours of their hair. One, whose hair was light yellow, was watering flowers. Another, with vermilion tresses, was trimming a hedge. The third, whose curls were chestnut brown, was polishing the scales of the other Game sprite.

It was… a dragon? A hydra? It looked like a dragon, but they didn't usually have more than one head. Even hydrae tended not to have more than nine, at least to start with. This creature had… well, far too many to count, but 128 didn't seem an unreasonable estimate. It had iridescent green scales and long, sinuous necks (so as not to crowd its heads), and it was curled around a tree in the very centre of the garden. The tree was huge; the lowest branches were too high up to even think about reaching. Hanging from the branches were shining golden apples.

Hearing Bob's whistle, the datoid Game sprites dropped their gardening tools and hurried over, wearing identical expressions of delight. Matrix's hand went to the hilt of his sword, but Bob shook his head; they didn't seem threatening. Although you never could tell.

"Welcome, cousins!" cried the yellow-haired girl.

"It's so nice to see you! We get so few visitors," added the brown-haired girl.

"What brings you here?" asked the orange-haired girl. Their voices were all the same, too. Bob wasn't surprised.

Well, they certainly seemed harmless enough so far. Bob bowed and flashed them his most charming smile. Resolutely ignoring Val's snickers, he said, "Hello, ladies. We'd like one of those lovely golden apples, if it's not too much trouble."

In perfect unison, the girls' smiles became worried frowns. Their eyes, Bob noticed, were also different colours: Brown's eyes matched her hair, Orange's were green like Val's, and Yellow's were almost exactly the same shade as Bob's own skin.

"Oh, dear," said Yellow.

"Father won't like that at all," said Brown.

"And then he'll make a frightful mess and make more work for us," said Orange.

"Don't tell him, then," suggested Val in a tone half conspiratorial, half condescending. "I'm sure he won't notice if one apple's gone."

"Oh, he will."

"He notices everything."

"He has very good eyes."

Matrix gave a snort of impatience. Bob treated the girls to another smile. "Would you excuse us for just one moment?" They nodded, their heads bobbing in tandem. The party walked a short distance away and went into a huddle.

"Well, they're not going to be much help," sneered Matrix.

"They're not very bright," agreed Val. "Maybe we could trick them into helping us?"

"I've got a better idea," said Enzo. He approached the Game sprites again. "Does that dragon breathe fire?"

"Fire?"

"I don't think so."

"I've never seen him do it, anyway."

"Good," said Enzo. He shot into the air, rising until he was well out of the dragon's reach, and headed for the apple tree. The dragon stretched its necks and snapped at him, but no flames were in evidence. Enzo waved cheerily at his friends and did a loop-de-loop, then proceeded towards the tree. Before he could seize an apple, however, what had looked like part of a distant mountain range reached out a hand and grabbed him.

"Enzo!" cried his companions as the hand disappeared into the clouds.

"Hello, Father!" chorused the girls, waving synchronously.

The three Guardians stared open-mouthed at the gargantuan Game sprite, then scattered and ran as a foot the size of Bob's living room lifted high into the air and descended towards them. It came down with a deafening thump with its toes near the apple tree and its heel next to its owner's smiling daughters. Matrix roared, leapt onto the nearest toe, ran up the foot, and started hacking at the ankle with his sword. The foot rose slightly again and shook, trying to dislodge him as one might a stinging insect.

Bob thought frantically, trying to think of something, anything, that he or Glitch could do against a Game sprite this large. He suspected it was beyond even a keytool's powers.

"If you seek to pass me by…"

The User was outside! Bob cast around desperately for something that might inspire him to a course of action and noticed Val, who seemed to be totally ignoring the fight. She was gazing with curious intensity at the nearest of the golden apples.

"Val!" he bellowed. "Do something!"

Val nodded, nocked an arrow, took careful aim, and shot the apple stem.

She was already running when the arrow hit. She climbed up a statue, just barely managed to jump onto the giant's foot, sprinted the length of it, and took a flying leap off the big toe. Even with the altitude this gave her, she was still well within reach of the dragon's nearest heads. Several of them came around and opened their mouths…

The apple smacked into Val's outstretched hand.

"Game Over."

There was an upward rush of purple, and Val did a belly flop on the sofa. Matrix thumped onto the carpet. Their movement through the Game had somehow taken them right into Bob's living room.

"Way to go, Val!" exclaimed Bob, although privately he wondered if his heart rate would ever return to normal. "That was quick thinking!"

"Yeah, thanks," panted Matrix.

Val pushed herself up into a sitting position and grinned her usual immodest grin, but it dissolved immediately.

"Hey, where's Enzo?"

They looked around in alarm and were about to start calling his name when they heard a rapidly crescendoing noise.

"aaaAAAAAAHHH!"

Enzo crashed, screaming, through the roof. Fortunately, Val's trampoline broke his fall.

Chapter Eight

---

[ Val's profile ]

[ Back to the Character Database ]

[ Main Page ]